Just to start off, one of my best friend shared this in one of our group chat recently, and the words in the message seem to hit me(slightly) in the head. Only then did I realised that for all that I can remember, I was never a person that has gives his all to something because of my passion.
Most of the time, people argue whether a cup is half-full, or half-empty, but in most of my scenario, it doesn't really matter if it's half-full or half-empty, what matter the most is that my cup had always been at half, and never full. That probably sums up my attitude towards life, or the way I do things: HALF-ASSED.
That's why if any of you had that thought in your mind and is deciding whether to tell me or not. I'm aware, just couldn't find a solution to it tho.
Going back to the message, I can't disagree with even a single thing.
Because to me, that's the definition of living a life - spending all your time and effort on chasing at something that you want the most, without being affected by your surrounding.
So when I think back, I don't seem to recall that there's anything that I've completely devoted my passion and time into. In certain time or situation, I did put more effort or time into something, but it never felt like it's 100%.
Also, one of the reason why I realised this is because I found out that I never really have/had a favourite singer/band. Never tried having the fanboy's "Die-die-must-attend-the-concert" feeling.
This is probably one of the reason why my days have been pretty gloomy recently. I'm not sure if I lost track of what I want in life, or if it's still something undiscovered. To be honest, it's depressing, or sometimes frustrates me at a certain level, because there are days that I felt like I needed every single thing, but there are also days where I felt like I don't want to do with anything anymore.
Sometimes, I wonder - am I normal for being like this? I guess one day I'll find it out.
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